I just wanted to tell you how much I have gotten from reading this blog in the past year! So much wisdom, insight and some damn fine poetic posts! You’ve inspired me to get [my child] and myself into martial arts! I’ve always been a great admirer of Martial Arts. I saw the Shaolin Monks perform in Vegas! I took a Capoeira workshop over 10 years ago, and then, before I became pregnant, I took Aikido for about a month only.

Anyway, it was always in the back of my head to find the martial art for me, and dive in, but it just never happened. When my son became the age to start classes, I was tearing my hair out because I couldn’t find anything close by, and I wanted him so badly to benefit from MA! Then, serendipitously, I discovered a dojang had opened [nearby]…and through one of those flash deal sites, I was able to get unlimited classes for a month for [a low price]! [My son] and I did this for the month of August and we are totally hooked! The teachers are amazing, and the dojang has such a friendly, helpful, positive energy.

I just wanted to thank you for the inspiration with all your stories of the struggles and rewards of MA! I love your writing! A

A: Thanks so much for writing in and telling me about your experience. This makes me feel great for you and your family. I know what you mean about energy and positivity. This kind of atmosphere is so good for our progress as humans, as well as fighters.

I’ve written a lot less lately on my training and experience, but between your mail and a couple other comments and emails I’ve received, I may pick it up a little bit. It’s great to know that what I do here goes beyond my own self gratification and note-taking.

Keep on, and I hope you let me know how things are going from time to time.

what happy and angry sheep we be…

i really can’t tell you how different it felt to be in this place (not included in foto, this is a view del otro lado de la calle) as compared to the banks i was turned down in. man. the banks were well vacuumed, well furnished, had coffee and couches and glass walls and well-dressed and perfumed people and even when they were nice, they were icy when it came down to rejecting me. the banks were business as usual, tons of cameras and a stifling and intimidating air. sort of how i felt when i’d go to someone’s house for dinner as a child and realized that they lived in a different world, a world where you weren’t allowed to sip out of the bowl, where you had to watch where your elbows where, and generally felt uptight about everything you did.

this credit union didn’t turn me out, they had worn benches, wood benches, a dirty rope instead of a velvet one, wood floors that almost smelled like a dog was somewhere in the joint. the first thing i noticed was that behind the counters (so short you actually sat down at them to do your business with the teller) the room was so informal and cluttered that it felt (and looked) just like someone’s house! books, junk, pictures hung up, shelves overloaded, plants, worn wood. the tellers knew all the people and laughed and talked with them, joked with each other. and this non-latino woman was talking fluent spanish with some mexicano at the counter. and then behind me, another one, and then i realized that the majority of customers were brown! whoa!

i sat down at the counter and the (‘white’) woman asked me if i preferred to go by my first name or middle name, and i just smiled and said my first name. (mexican naming consideration and such). and we spoke english (good thing for me) but i felt at home. i really liked how all the mexicanos were treated like good people. just part of the flow, as we all should be.

if they ran my credit, i couldnt tell. in the bank, when the supposedly-friendly man (there were signs everywhere, clearly part of tthe banks’ ad campaign, different lines about “nice people do this, do that, smile pretty,e tc, welcome mat said WELCOME NICE PERSON!) when he ran my credit his face soured like he had just smelled a fart and then his Nice Man Voice got trembly and clipped at the edges and he told me they couldn’t help me and i walked out feeling so stupid, but in this place there was none of that and she simply told me that i would need to wait until this date to access the cash, and after a few deposits of the same check, they wouldn’t need to hold them anymore, and i could cash them right away.

the rail was rusted on the outside of the joint, and i put my hand on it smiling, walked out of there, and went back to the “classier” part of town. where i seem to live. (though in a cheap apartment building.)

allright—may 3 is la fiesta, then. mark it, vat@s! it’s a saturday dropped down perfectly between may 1 (mayday) and el cinco de mayo (may 5), and so good energy is wrapped allllll ’round it (plus it’s right after Kevin’s bday, can’t lose). there are numerous hotel/motel/lodges nearby, as we are in eugene, oregon, one of the well-populated and hip towns that exists in oregon (one of the two?), not to mention this is a university town. while my home is not big (just an apartment), the livingroom is relatively large, and if anyone needs to crash out there, they are welcome. i think there’s plenty of room for whomevah shows up, there’s even some room on my outside benches to chill (parties are best anyway when you can drift around a little), but if in the event we get enough peeples showing up that we are cramped, we’ll take it out into the town. there’s my favorite mexican joint which has tables outside, there’s a fantastic bar and grill place (with, of course, veggie dishes), there’s really no lack of places we can take it. and i’ll know by then how many to expect, i’m sure. SO. right on. it will be a combo birthday (only gift i want you to bring is ya badself!)/spring/takin-the-blog-crew-into 3D fiesta.

so i’ve really finally begun to shift my life in some ways, to this new gig. shift the room and such, the living space.

room decor has changed. actually moved two guitars, so that tells you a lot. took them down and put up my videojournalist gear in its place. opposite that, i’ve got a giant corkboard, a big calendar on the wall, a map of oregon, and i spent a while putting up these two sturdy shelves. all my gear from tripod dolly to sound recorder to hi-8 to blackbag is up there (not that i have much use for a blackbag anymore, a light-tight black tent you change film reels in or work with photo-sensitive material). lav mics and videotapes and a zip-up little accordian jobbie for all my release forms. i’ve got to run one of the fones in here and maybe even the fax, but that’s it. i have to decide if i want to give up the blue armchair and just push it totally into the functional. if so, a table for the fax and phone gear.

and tomorrow’s the first real day i’m going to hit the bricks and try this thing out on the fly. the cold is mostly hanging out in my lungs, so that’s good, it’s out of my head. i wish it would leave altogether, but it’s manageable, i think. so i think i’m gonna hoof it around the university and random sample people there, and on the way there…and then walk around town proper and see who fate directs me to. it’s wide open. i’m going to have to design a few different versions of gear. heavy, light and medium. tomorrow will be a good test. what can i walk around with. be like a soldier, weighted down, but very deliberately and carefully and efficiently weighted down.

for tomorrow:

•  scan pages again to get the story and facts solid. bring print out.

• assemble light mobile shooting kit. make sure to bring as many release forms as possible, especially for people. just in case.

• call university and other contacts about [-----] story, get interview, hopefully for today, even something quick. or try!

•  write list of questions, even if i don’t get to each one, be familiar with a basic line of questioning.

• hit the bricks! if you talk to people and have the time, hit them up with questions for more than one topic. might as well have them weigh in on first two project topics, who knows where the gold will be? remember that in the areas in which you choose to travel. go as wide as you can to get good samples. make the very first step simply signing the release.

•  pick up ink.

• print out cards or have cards made. need something for quick contacts. very important that i have something to hand to people and that they can hold on to. especially those who have no cell phone to plug info into.

• come home and digitize footage. decide if another day is needed.

• don’t mistake the due day this time. it’s wednesday. wednesday. 7 am.

oh, and tonight,

• check batteries, charge if necessary.

it all still feels a bit trippy. but i better get used to it quickly. and i’m sure that after tomorrow, it will begin to feel less fantastic. after i’ve had a solid day of being Señor Public Citizen Journalist. get a system down, or begin to.

i can see this turnaround is going to be very fast. one week is not much. but if you think of it in TV terms, it is nothing. in TV news people turn a story around on a dime. complete with snazzy graphics package and new soundtrack. so this is, again, in this nether area. an experiment! in more than one way.

well. here we go. in the great unknown.

feel free to speak up here…or email me. give me an idea of whether or not to consider it seriously. its tuff when you make friends with people online…you feel like you should be able to say “come on over on thursday!” and that’s usually not the case. people are like “i live in puerto rico.” or “i’m in britain” etc. and you’re like “but no…i just had an IM with you…are you SURE you’re not in the next apartment????”

hanks to my online amigos, mi novia’s hurting teeth can be fixed. ustedes sent us $255 in paypal funds and then, just the day before yesterday i got a big knock on the door and opened it to find a smallish box sitting before me. can you guess what was in that box?

amazing! a little chest of quarters! wow! i haven’t counted them yet, but i’m guessing it is no less than $400. so you see, you all actually took care of 90% what our insurance wouldn’t! and the rest won’t be a problem. between all of this and i’m SURE we can find a dentist who charges at least a little less, we are good. i’m so…well, of course, i’m overwhelmed. with gratitude. and of course i am so relieved that she can get her teeth fixed with no further delay.

but also, this gives me hope in US. you and me. not the misplaced uneasy sense of “security” we get from fucking massive insurance companies. isn’t that a joke!!! i mean aren’t THEY supposed to be why we pay all year? aren’t THEY why i shouldn’t have to ask you? so why do we use them? fuck them! all we need is ourselves. we help each other out when we need it. you better believe the next time one of you posts on needing money for something, from a computer breaking to a tooth breaking to a job breaking, i am going to pitch in. just like i’ve done already in the past, because this was done for me before, too. see? a cycle of giving. that’s how it CAN work. the FEAR is what makes us think ‘no no no gotta take care of minez, gotta hoard! can’t lose any!’ and the HOPE and the heart are what makes us say “i can give him/her something now, because i have some extra, and they need it. and i dont want to see them hurt…and i hope others can do for me, too, if i need it.”

others can have and keep the individualist/ capitalist/ republican/ whateveryouwanttocallit “gotz minez” approach. me, i’d rather have comunidad.

gracias to mis amig@s.